Teenage Basketball Player increases his resilence capacity and learns!

Being an adolescent young man is hard enough! Add in vulnerability during a high school basketball game receiving a “hard foul” then missing one of the two shots you were given  really tried him.

Friday night I had the opportunity to help this young man increase his capacity emotionally.   After the big game they lost, and before the junior varsity game.
He came and sat a little to the left of me in the bleachers.  I saw him out of the corner of my eye.  I saw an activation in his nervous system, red eyes, face and shakey.  Parents around were trying to say things to him, that I perceived not very helpful via my training.

Heidi asked if I could help.  He agreed!!! He sat next to me.

Is your body hurt?  He replied no.  Emotions hurt?  Yes.  Want to talk? NO.  Can I share what I do?  Got a yes.;-) Can you name the feeling?  Yes!I got really close in his ear as the cheering around us was loud!

Put your hand on your heart.  Breathe through heart. (I did briefly explain the physiology of that)  Amazingly he did, closed his eyes even.  Then I asked him to find a time that he truly felt gratitude or appreciation (I did give a few suggestions)  He did!

In about 3 minutes I asked him how it was for him now?  He answered calmer.  Yet, I noticed his leg still moving.  Asked him if this was a familiar feeling.  Again yes.  Invited him back to his heart, this time with feeling of compassion for all the times he felt that way.  He did!

As we looked at each other eye to eye, heart to heart I told him “when we remember to do this, we access the truest part of our Self rather than being swept away by our emotions”.

He smiled and expressed his gratitude;-) Ahh resiliency!

Our teenagers today are looking for skills to help them navigate through the hormonal and emotional changes they are experiencing.

Let me know what you think!